DBZ Ultimate Fighting
by Super Neko Majin
Summary: In the Tenkaichi Zekkou Budokai, the strongest fighters in the universe fight for fame, glory and the chance to prove their power! There's no overarching story arc; it's more like the UFC than the original Budokai. It's just a chance for fun fights between characters who would never fight in the series.
"Welcome to the one and only Tenkaichi Zekkou Budokai!" The arena was packed tonight. Thousands of people had come to watch tonight's fight. Other tournaments had skilled fighters, but only the TZB's fighters had the power of ki. The TZB hadn't been very popular until one day, Goku came looking for a challenge. Then the Z Fighters came, and then all the people who wanted to beat the Z Fighters, until it was a thriving industry. It was less of a tournament and more of an agency; any fighter could challenge anyone else. There was no out-of-bounds; you fought until you couldn't fight anymore. Even killing was legal; with multiple sets of Dragon Balls and the Supreme Kais at their disposal, the TZB could easily revive anyone within a week. Only sabotaging the tournament could get you banned.

"Thank you all for being here today! Now, tonight's fight is one that you've all been waiting for! For years, everyone's wanted to see Cell fight, but he never joined us... until now! And we've got just the challenger for him! In the blue corner, the Hyper Tornado, the strongest warrior in Heaven! Standing 6'2" tall, weighing in at 160 pounds... Pikkon! And in the red corner-" The announcer stopped. He'd just realized no one was in the red corner.

 **2 minutes earlier**

Cell was on the phone with his agent, and he was furious. "No, no, no! I wanted to fight Piccolo. It's not that hard!"

A hundred miles away, Yamcha was in a hotel smoking a cigar and wearing a suit that was probably worth more than his life. "Hey, look on the bright side. Just look at Pikkon. It'll be just like the real thing!"

"Just because Ice Ice Baby sounds just like Under Pressure doesn't make it as good. You're friends with him, you should have been able to get him!"

"I tried as hard as I could, but I just couldn't get him, alright? Apparently, he and the other Namekians are in some hot water with Nam right now."

 **Somewhere in India**

"You drank all the water for my village!"

"Didn't Goku tell you water was free?"

"Well he lied! You have to pay just to get the water, you have to pay to get the water to my village, and did you know they tried to charge me 500 zeni for water in plastic that tastes like piss?"

"Go find that "roaming lake" or whatever, I don't care."

"Yeah, I'll find the Roaming Lake when Dende asks for a medkit!"

 **Back to Cell**

Cell's eyes almost popped out of his head. "First of all, I didn't even know 'Nam existed in this world. Second, why is Piccolo speaking for Namek? He doesn't even live there! And third, 'Nam is almost an island! How does it not have enough water?"

Yamcha sighed. "Dammit, I'm not talking about Vietnam! Nam is a per- Look. Just go out, fight him and get me- I mean get us paid. I heard Pikkon's actually pretty powerful, so it should be a decent fight."

Cell considered that for a moment. Yamcha wasn't good for much, but he did know a lot about martial artists. If Yamcha thought Pikkon could challenge him, he was probably right. "Fine. But if this goes under, I'm making a Cell Junior and having him hug you and blow up." Yamcha started to curse at him as Cell ended the call. He sighed and walked to the door.

 **The Present**

The announcer was getting worried. This was Cell's big moment, and if he didn't show, he, and more importantly the TZB, would be letting millions of people down. Suddenly, the doors started to glow. They went flying out of their hinges and into the arena as Cell confidently walked into the ring, his hand still smoking from blasting the doors. "Thank God. Ahem- The Perfect Man and the runner-up of the Cell Games! Standing 6'5", weighing in at 175 pounds... Cell!" Cell flexed his arm, and he could have sworn he saw some women faint in the audience. "Now let the fight... begin!"

Pikkon and Cell stared each other down for a few seconds until Pikkon spoke. "You think you're the perfect fighter. You think you can beat me. But even if you are the strongest fighter in the world, I'm the strongest fighter in all of Heaven! There's no way you can win!" Cell laughed. "Heaven? That place with the purple guy that goes around saying 'Oh no, I'm afraid of Pui Pui!'? You might as well say you're the strongest person in Alaska!" Pikkon's face changed. "Oh, that is it!" He flew towards Cell at full speed, punching him into the air. He disappeared and appeared above Cell, smashing him back to the ground. Cell stood back up and charged at Pikkon. They punched each other at super-speed for a bit, but Cell couldn't land a single hit. After a few seconds, Pikkon punched him into the ground. "Give up now, Cell! You don't have a chance!" Cell got up. "Impressive. I'll admit, you're a lot more powerful than I thought, but I'm just getting started!" Cell's aura flared, turning from blue to gold as he became a Super Saiyan.

The audience was excited. Even in the TZB, it wasn't every day you saw two people this strong fight. Pikkon smiled. "This might be a good fight after all." They flew towards each other again, punching each other until they flew apart, evenly matched. Cell cupped his hands at his sides. "Ka... Me..." Pikkon looked shocked. "Isn't that Goku's technique? How does this thing know Goku?" Cell kept charging energy. "Ha... Me..." Pikkon charged at Cell to stop the blast, but it was too late. "HAAAA!" Cell hit his foe with the Kamehameha's full blast. Pikkon was forced back. He was hurt and his clothes were on fire, but he didn't even fall down. Instead, he started shooting ki blasts at incredible speeds. Cell took a stance and put his arms up to block them, but even then they were still pushing him back. Suddenly, Cell flew in the air away from the blasts and started firing Death Beams at the same speed. Pikkon stopped firing and dodged the beams, but one grazed his arm, burning it. "Seriously, Pikkon? You're that strong and the best you can come up with is more dakka?" _This guy is_ _strong_ , Pikkon thought. _I'd better_ _start taking this seriously_ _._

"As a matter of fact, it's not!" Pikkon started spinning so fast even Cell couldn't track his movements. The spinning made a wind storm around Pikkon. "Hyper Tornado!" Pikkon launched himself towards Cell and caught him in the tornado. The force of the winds trapped Cell and even hurt him, and the audience was pushed back into their seats. "There's no escape from the Hyper Tornado, Cell. Eventually, you'll run out of air and I'll win!" Cell didn't need to breathe, but as far as he could tell, there was no way out. Except... "You know, for all our flashy techniques, there's one thing everyone forgets about: psychic power!" Cell clenched his fists, and suddenly Pikkon started slowing down, trapped in Cell's psychic grip. It wasn't much, but it was enough for Cell to fly out of the tornado.

Pikkon was out of breath. "You're a clever bastard, aren't you. You've got too many techniques. Still, there's one thing techniques can't resist, and that's overwhelming power!" Cell felt something hard hit his head, knocking him out. He woke up a few seconds later on the ground, and realized two things: First, the thing that hit his head was Pikkon's turban, and second, Pikkon's white robes were on his chest and hands. He tried to get up, but something was holding him down. Cell was confused. "What did you do to me?" Pikkon smirked. "My clothing's not just for show. My turban and robes are made of katchin, the densest substance in the universe. Basically, I just laid 500 tons of metal on you." This was bad. Cell could shoot eye lasers, but that wouldn't be nearly enough to defeat Pikkon, and with his hands bound there was only one option. As Pikkon started to walk out of the arena in victory, he saw an explosion of gold behind him. He turned around to see Cell standing up with the weighted robe on the ground, surrounded by golden energy. "Sorry to keep you waiting. I didn't think you were strong enough to see my full power!"

Pikkon was scared; he had no idea someone like this existed! He still had a chance, but only if he went all-out. He rushed at Cell yet again. The two locked hands as their auras, one gold and one blue, flared up behind them, leaving the audience and even some of the other fighters in awe. Finally, Cell pushed Pikkon away and kicked him into the air. Pikkon recovered quickly and flew at Cell while shooting Ki blasts, smashing him into the wall. Pikkon went to finish Cell off, but Cell was ready and shot him with an Explosive Demon Wave. "You're incredible, Cell. I never thought I'd face a worthy challenge, but you still haven't seen my best technique! Burning Shoot!" Pikkon's aura flared up. His aura wasn't just golden or orange; it looked like he was actually on fire! He hit Cell with a powerful kick in the neck. The kick would have done serious damage on its own; with the power of the Burning Shoot backing it up, it was enough to kick Cell's head off.

Pikkon hadn't wanted to kill Cell, but he knew Cell was evil and didn't regret it. He looked down at Cell's head, and said "That's the end of that." But it wasn't; Pikkon stared open-mouthed as Cell's head rose into the air. "You are impressive, I'll give you that. Heaven might have just upgraded to Canada. But you never had a chance." Before Pikkon's horrified eyes, a lump grew from Cell's head. No, not a lump, he realized, but a torso. Arms and legs grew from it, and in less than ten seconds Cell had fully regenerated his body. "You see, I told you a half-truth. This is my full power as a Super Saiyan 1, but I can still go one step further." Suddenly, Cell started powering up even further. Lightning appeared in his aura, and when it was done, he had become Super Perfect Cell.

 **In the Majin box**

Dabura was watching the fight, and checked his power meter to see Cell's new power. Dabura's meter was special; unlike the others, which could only detect 3,000 kili, his meter went up to three times that. Babidi peeked over his shoulder. "Dabura, what does the power meter say?" Dabura looked, but to his shock, the meter was maxed out. "It's too high to measure! But that means his Kili reading is over 9,000!"

Super Buu and Majin Buu peeked out from their section of living space. "What are you screaming about? I'm trying to feel the fight, but I can't concentrate!" The minds of four people who knew how to sense ki meant that Super Buu's ki sense was better than his sight. Dabura pointed to the meter. "It's over 9,000!" Majin Buu looked scared. "9,000? That sounds scary." Super Buu patted him on the head. "Don't worry, he can't hurt you with a power like that. Besides, I wouldn't let anything happen to you." He turned to Dabura. "Case in point. We live with Majin Buu. His power is what, 40,000 kili? 50,000? More? And we all know how powerful I am. I'm going back to meditate. Don't call me out again unless you see someone with _real_ power, although I'll probably feel him long before you do anyway."

 **Back to the fight**

Pikkon took a step back. He never imagined Cell was still holding back any power, much less that he'd only been at half strength before. Still, he had to win. "Burning Shoot!" He hit Cell again, but this time, it didn't do nearly as much. "My power is equal to your Burning Shoot. It just feels like a regular attack now." Cell flicked him away. Pikkon was getting desperate. He used the Burning Shoot over and over, effectively making himself as strong as Cell, but it was useless. "People always talk about speed and strength, but both of those are nothing if you can't take a hit." Pikkon was still only as tough as before, and Cell knocked him away again. Things were looking hopeless for Pikkon when he remembered he still had one last attack. "Alright, big guy. You've had your fun, but no matter how powerful you are, no one can resist my Thunder Flash!" Pikkon started charging up energy. The Thunder Flash wasn't a very good attack because it took so long to charge, but fortunately, Cell wasn't moving. After almost 30 seconds, Pikkon put his arms in front of him. He'd put all his power into this attack. Cell laughed. "Before you fire that, let me call Vegeta. He wants his technique back!" "The only place you'll be calling is Hell!" Fire started to dance on Pikkon's hands. "Burning Shoot!"

It was a shame. The Burning Shoot on top of the Thunder Flash had incredible power. There were even some raised eyebrows from the Z Fighters' box. It might have worked if Pikkon had seen Cell putting two fingers up to his head. But he didn't, and when he found out Cell had dodged, it was because Cell had shot a Death Beam into his head from behind. Pikkon was dead, and unlike Cell, he couldn't regenerate. The announcer ran over to Cell. Anyone else would have fled, but this man had almost been killed three times in the old Tenkaichi Budokai. He was used to this. "And the winner is... Cell!" He handed Cell a check for 20 million Zeni, but Cell destroyed it with a tiny ki blast. "Thanks, but it was worth it just for the fight. Besides, if I want something, I'll take it." And that's how Cell's first match went in the Tenkaichi Zettou Budokai.

 **Author's Note:**

 **So, how did you like it? This is my first real fighting story, but I hope to do more fights like this in the future. I'll do just about any characters as long as they're remotely close in power. I don't like one-hit-kills unless the fight is good for other reasons. I'm more like Toriyama that way; I like to watch characters gradually show off more and more power until one finally wins. I won't do fanon characters, but I will do video game characters, so with DBH that's pretty much the same thing. ;) Just some clarifications:**

 **1\. Cell going Super Saiyan is just him using his real power. It's not some kind of new ability.**

 **2\. Each group has their own section (box) in the audience, and some living space behind it. If you've read Dragon Ball Multiverse, it's kind of like that except it's grouped by team, not universe. So the Z Fighters are in one box, the Majins are in another box, Frieza's forces are in a third, etc.**

 **3\. Mr. Satan will not be appearing. He tried to get in, but he couldn't pass their tests. Videl, however, is living it up in the Z Fighters' box.**

 **4\. I'm not trying to ship Super Buu (that's Buu with Gohan absorbed, BTW) and Majin Buu. Majin Buu has godlike power, but he's really a child and needs someone to take care of him. Mr. Satan is that person, but if I used him, he'd have to be in the tournament which is a big no-no. Super Buu has Majin Buu inside him, so it makes sense that he'd care about Majin Buu. He's also smarter than Mr. Satan, has an excuse to be in the Majins' box, and he can protect him from people like Babidi. I want this series to be mostly about fighting, but any good story should have character interaction.**

 **That's all for now!**


End file.
